Matrignosis: A Blog About Inner Wisdom

Think Pyschologically; Live Spiritually

Healing Wounded Masculine and Feminine Energy: Part I September 21, 2010

In response to my post, “Breaking Through to the One Thing,” Annette asked how to heal the masculine energy in women and feminine energy in men. This is a great question and a very welcome one. I’ve been wanting to deal with the “How-To’s” for a while now. So in this and the next post I’ll be presenting my “prescription” for healing and empowering the soul.

The short answer is inner work. Don’t let the word “work” put you off. Healing the psyche is not mindless hard labor that saps your energy for a meager payoff, but a work of love that gets progressively easier and more rewarding. Why? Because it fills us with well-being to transcend our ignorance and grow in consciousness. This is our job, the hero’s journey, our magnum opus.

The process is essentially the same for both genders and applies to all aspects of the psyche. This is because every psyche is fueled by two streams of energy.  We think of one as masculine and the other as feminine. Every psychological quality, action, or way of perceiving of which we are capable belongs to one or the other of these categories. (Remember, this is not about gender stereotypes, roles, or sexuality, but psycho-spiritual functioning.) When both streams are allowed to flow freely and spontaneously, unimpeded by mental or physical blockages, our bodies and minds function at optimum levels.

The long answer is that there are four steps to inner work. While I could write a book about each step, I’m sure you wouldn’t want to read it here. So I’ll keep it short and simple.

Step #1: Set Your Intention. Healing begins when you make a conscious choice to take your inner discomfort seriously and take action to overcome your resistance, laziness, apathy, and inertia. The greatest obstacle is fear. Most of us are very intimidated by the idea of discovering something disagreeable about ourselves and it takes an unusually strong and healthy ego to delve deeply into the unconscious. But if you remember that giving in to your fear will only perpetuate your suffering and keep you from bringing out your best, you can acquire the courage and self-discipline to stand up, step out, and show up with a warrior’s “Just do it” determination.

But what action will you be taking? What will you be showing up for? Essentially the same things you would do to heal a physical dis-ease: Take your medicine, exercise, and diet.

Step #2. Take Your Medicine. The medicine that heals souls is self-knowledge. To acquire it you need to seek help and do your homework. People who have been on the path for many years know what you’re going through. They can help you pinpoint problems and suggest treatments. Don’t overlook this step. Surrender is part of the solution. If studying with a mentor, enrolling in classes, attending workshops, or getting counseling is out of the question because of time or money restraints, then find a study partner or start a study group and read. Read. Read!

My favorite early author/mentors were Jungians Robert A. Johnson (Inner Work, He, She, and We),   John Sanford (The Invisible Partners and The Kingdom Within), and Marion Woodman (The Ravaged Bridegroom, The Pregnant Virgin, Addiction to Perfection). I highly recommend these brilliant writers whose healing wisdom comes from years of personal experience. Their works contain extraordinary gems of wisdom and I encourage anyone who’s interested to check them out. Meanwhile, stay tuned for steps #3 and #4.

Healing the Sacred Divide can be found here at Amazon and Larson Publications, Inc.

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10 Responses to “Healing Wounded Masculine and Feminine Energy: Part I”

  1. Sandy Says:

    YES Jeanie! I love how you described inner work “Healing the psyche is not mindless hard labor that saps your energy for a meager payoff, but a work of love that gets progressively easier and more rewarding. Why? Because it fills us with well-being to transcend our ignorance and grow in consciousness. This is our job, the hero’s journey, our magnum opus.” YES, YES, YES! Everything in me cheers – Right on Jeanie!

    I found it hard to describe the “hard work” yet profoundly personal and meaningful result of inner work – However – You described this process in your post so well, including how the work of healing and individuation yields a special kind of joy/meaning that is so worth the process of shaking off our barnacles.

    In my experience I realized my unhealthy parts might have served a useful purpose at one time, however, there came a time for me to let go of my training wheels and ride free. The best part of discovering my “disagreeable” parts is discovering a far healthier version that lived underneath just waiting for the light of day and proper individualized nourishment. With that, light of day and nourishment my true “acorn” has a chance to grow into my natural and authentic blueprint – me – the “me” that fits most naturally in the world and gives from that place. And for me, this is an exciting, surprising, adventurous and sometimes very bumpy and difficult, but nonetheless a profoundly worthwhile and fun journey.

    Thanks Jeanie for your tremendous contribution to my individuation journey via your great writing in your blog.

    Love,
    Sandy

  2. jeanraffa Says:

    Thank you, Sandy,

    Back at you about the great writing. I loved your colorful images. Here’s to the joy and meaning that come from nourishing our acorns and shaking off our barnacles!

    Love,
    Jeanie

  3. ram0singhal Says:

    divine…..when you buy a car you get a simple manual…..there is a difference between engineer and driver……normal people are like driver and you as a engineer…..now you have a great responsibility to put a simple manual…..

    the ultimate destination is to cross dream level in time to no dream level in timelessness….

    childhood time up to 3 years is the time of timelessness that is why we do not remember anything from birth till 3 years normally….that is the time of oneness between masculine and feminine energy…left and right brain….
    that is your right and left hand…….so for oneness bring them together…so
    create a ritual for driver is…..prayer in the morning …..prayer in the evening….simple but hidden intelligence of a engineer…..bring both hands together to continue healing through out day…..the eastern greeting Namaste was invented thousand of years ago….try not to shake hand with
    people unless protocol demands….just namaste….with both hand in namaste one can not think anger….experiment and see yourself…..

    you have given two steps…very nice……another two steps from you….
    always good post from you….worth time…..bless you…

    love all…..

    • jeanraffa Says:

      ram0singhal,

      You are very kind. I’m so technologically challenged that I’ve never thought of myself as an engineer. But I truly am trying to write a clear and simple manual for inner work, and despite my familiarity with this subject I am finding that very challenging too.

      I love your “ultimate destination is to cross dream level in time to no dream level in timelessness.” It’s always about integrating opposites, isn’t it?

      Blessings,
      Jeanie

  4. ram0singhal Says:

    divine….earlier alphabets size was nicer and easy reading…..just a suggestion ….
    love all….

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Are you talking about the size of the print on my posts? If so, I haven’t changed it. This is something WordPress controls and I don’t think I have any control over that. Maybe the size gets smaller with the more words I use? I’ll check into that.

      Best,
      Jeanie

  5. exciting material, jeanie. i admire the way you are synthesizing all your experiences and knowledge into a practical vehicle for self-realization. more than that, i think: self-transformation. isn’t it grand to get to this point of distilling it all down…..?

    looking forward to #3 and #4!!

    all the best,
    william

  6. jeanraffa Says:

    Thank you, William. I agree, and believe there is a cause-and-effect relationship between self-realization and self-transformation. And yes, while it is grand to get to the point of distillation, it is also extremely daunting to render the elixer palatable. I’m beginning to get the reason for Zen koans. At some point you just have to abandon logic and dive into intution.

    My best,
    Jeanie

  7. Hi Jeanie,
    I am so happy to come across your page. Who is the artist for the painting you have? It’s such a beautiful piece.
    I love what you wrote. And I agree with Sandy, the part where you describe that “Healing the psyche is not mindless hard labor that saps your energy for a meager payoff, but a work of love that gets progressively easier and more rewarding” is beautiful. Yes, it is a work of love.
    I am passionate about finding our way to the parts of us that we have learned to deny, the parts that were shamed (the masculine or feminine). I feel such denial propagates both our attachment to specific identities about ourselves as well as our feelings of resentment and anger that get projected on to others (which create the split(s) within our selves and within our community).
    So here’s to the work of love.
    Nora

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Thank you, Nora. I’m sorry, but I don’t know the name of the artist. I found the picture on Google Free Images a while back and didn’t see the name. I might have searched for something like Loving Man and Woman…..

      Yes, denial of our shadows is a plague that threatens to destroy us, and inner work that leads to love is the remedy! Here’s to the work of love, indeed!

      Blessings, Jeanie


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