Matrignosis: A Blog About Inner Wisdom

Think Pyschologically; Live Spiritually

Grandparenting October 2, 2010

I just learned that September 12th was Grandparents Day. I missed it, but intend to celebrate it next year. The catalyst for this decision is an essay my eight-year-old granddaughter recently wrote for her third grade science and social studies class. I offer it with her original words and spelling for all you grandparents to enjoy.

“The Best Summer Ever!”

When I went on a trip to North Carolina I saw the greenest emrald grass and I saw the most robin’s egg blue sky. There was a shimmering pearl sun. It was so beautiful! It felt so good. Would you like that? I went to the barn and met my grandma. She helped me on the horse and rode and rode and rode until I was so tired. We went up to the house for dinner. The next day was even better, I got to ride the zipline and then I went to horse riding class. Horse riding was fun, but not as much as at home. After horse riding I got to play in the stream. Would you feel the same as I did? That night we had dinner outside. There was a gentle breeze and a lovely, gorgeous cobalt sky. I could see purple mountains waiting. It felt like a dream. It felt so good. It felt magical. What I imagined was marrvellous. I dreamed the horse would be waiting for me in the morning, and sure enough he was waiting for me the same way I had dreamed. My heart was racing to ride, but I started running and stopped for my grandma. I rode until sunset. It was peaceful that night and so beautiful. I just new I wouldn’t forget that amazing, beautiful, peaceful, happy, day! It was thrilling enough to make a girl cry. It was a great summer that I will never ever forget!

What does my granddaughter’s essay have to do with this blog’s theme of thinking psychologically and living spiritually? Oh, I don’t know……..  Everything?

Thinking Psychologically is the secret to waking up to our life and truly living it. Without self-knowledge we are like dry flower seeds in a sealed packet. If we are not planted, watered, fertilized, and exposed to light we will not grow. If we do not grow we cannot nourish others with the blessing of our dormant beauty. Thus, we withhold from the next generation — and the one after that — the single most valuable gift we have to offer: our truest, wisest, highest and deepest selves. In doing so we deprive our progeny of a special kind of mentoring that could guide them on their own journey to meaningful living. So I ask myself, would I have been able to help give my granddaughter her Best Summer Ever if I had not spent the past forty years struggling to grow into myself?

Then there’s Living Spiritually. I believe, in the words of Episcopal Bishop John Spong, that our spiritual goals are to “live fully, love wastefully, and be all we are meant to be.” Loving my grandchildren, being loved by them in return, enjoying the privilege of spending time with them in a place I helped create, where I feel free to be who I am and do what I love, is my idea of paradise. I don’t manage to live that way all the time, of course, but when I do it feels deeply spiritual.

Contrary to messages from the materialistic world, Grandparenting is not just about giving. It’s also about being the gift. May we each be gifts that will help our grandchildren live full and meaningful lives.

You can find Healing the Sacred Divide at this amazon link and at Larson Publications.

 

15 Responses to “Grandparenting”

  1. Sandy Says:

    Loved this post -what gold you offer us! I loved your granddaughters and your writing and sharing. Yes! May we each become and be gifts. Thank you Jeanie and thanks to your granddaughter! Blessings, Sandy

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  2. jeanraffa Says:

    Thank you, Sandy. Sending blessings your way too. Jeanie

    Like

  3. Beth Black Says:

    Lovely, Jeanie! It is so nice to really understand what “mellow” means. Like a fine wine we are better with age and being open and breathing a bit!! Then we are present to receive the wonderful gifts of grandchildren!

    Like

  4. jeanraffa Says:

    Hi Beth,

    I hadn’t thought about it that way, but I totally agree. Living fully, loving wastefully, and just being who we are really is a perfect definition of mellow. No striving, no pressure, just being ourselves! How exquisite. And how rare. Like a very fine wine it takes a lot of time and effort to get that way, indeed! I love your analogy. Cheers!
    Love, Jeanie

    Like

  5. joanpohl Says:

    I was very moved by this. So well thought out and meaningful.
    I hope to someday enjoy being a grandparent.
    I have been told it is more fun than being a parent.

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Thank you, Joan. I’m glad it was meaningful for you. Yes, it is lots more fun. I see it as my reward for trying so hard with my own children, as well as affirmation of having been a good-enough parent.

      Love, Jeanie

      Like

  6. joanpohl Says:

    Thank you for sharing this . It is very insightful and meaningful

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  7. ram0singhal Says:

    divine…..many time describe God like grand parents…..grandchildren and grand parents conversations are one of the finest conversations happens in time…..if somebody ask me ….purpose of life…answer will always be to play with grand children…..that we can call spiritual living…..recently my granddaughter 5 years she was making set of opposite suddenly she picks beautiful….searching the answer…so I tell…ugly…….but to my surprise she tell there is no ugly in this world……little enlightened master…so is your grand daughter ..writing about horse waiting next morning…..
    one day …world will realise the spiritual importance of this relationship again….
    please visit…http://nature0wonderama.wordpress.com/2010/10/02/god-garland-of-dance-240/ view from 230 t0 240…..will appreciate your comments…
    love all…

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    • jeanraffa Says:

      Dear Ram0singhal,

      Little enlightened masters, indeed. Children seem so much closer to meaning and Mystery don’t they? And then we grow up and away and spend the rest of our lives trying to get back.

      I love your happiness notes. The pictures are so delightful, the concepts so simple yet profound. What wonderful work. And a lovely gift.

      Blessings,
      Jeanie

      Like

  8. Betsy Holleman Says:

    Beautiful! I love to say that if I had known how much fun it was to be a grandparent, I would have done if first! Hope you are well. xxxB

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Hi Betsy,

      Did I ever share this saying from Anne Morrow Lindbergh with you? She said, “Grandchildren are the love affair of old age.” I get that!

      All is very well, indeed. I hope the same is true for you.

      Love,
      Jeanie

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  9. Jeanie,

    I am stunned and in awe of your grand-daughter. Her writing is so clear and transparent, it gives me a window right into the world into just those moments as they occurred in her heart. More than that, though, I am so impressed with her perceptions, her attention to details outside and all the other details inside. What a wonderful balance of sensory attention, emotional discernment and intellectual expression! I can imagine how proud you are of her!

    Proof again that the apple does not fall far from the tree…..

    My day has just been made much brighter: thank you, dear one!
    William

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    • jeanraffa Says:

      William, How sweet you are! I was pretty stunned by her writing myself, and am ve ry happy to claim her as one of my particular brand of apples. I actually hadn’t noticed the beautiful balance of her perceptions, however, and must thank you for calling it to my attention. Now I have that much more to be proud of and enjoy! I know your grandson will give you every bit as much pleasure in the years to come. I’m very glad her story made your day much brighter. Wish I could send more of our Florida sunshine your way; we have an overabundance these days!! With much warmth, Jeanie

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  10. Donna Grantham Says:

    Oh Jeannie!
    This brought tears to my eyes! I cannot believe an 8 year old wrote this!! I could picture your grass, sky, the horses, and the outdoor dinner with the breezes. How beautiful and VERY SPIRITUAL!

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Hi Donna, I’m so delighted you found this one meaningful. I could hardly believe she wrote it either. I think her teacher must be very special to have brought all this out of her. Our grandchildren are such extraordinary gifts, aren’t they? There’s little in life as satisfying as watching them learn and grow and knowing we’ve had a little something to do with it. Give yours a kiss for me! Love, Jeanie

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