Matrignosis: A Blog About Inner Wisdom

Think Pyschologically; Live Spiritually

Love Letter to the Unknown June 4, 2013

87175589My dear friends and followers,

Three and-a-quarter years ago, on March 10, 2010, my spirit stepped out on a new adventure. With a minimum of technical expertise and a maximum of self-doubt, I published my first blog post. The idea came from my agent and editor, Paul Cash, who thought a blog would be a good venue for my writing and a place where potential publishers could see samples of my work.

At his suggestion, a few months earlier I had hired a social media trainer. With infinite patience and remarkable skill, Dawn Jensen gently nudged me into the new and exciting world of the internet, the vast potential of which I was previously barely aware. Initially, the challenges of writing and publishing two posts a week, (which seemed doable at that time), plus learning and navigating the intricacies of Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn, were enormous.

Obstacles presented by my personality were equally daunting. A major hurdle was my distaste for self-promotion. But since publishers are rarely attracted to writers who hide their lights under bushels, I knew this was something I needed to overcome. Another problem was that, conditioned from youth to keep my most meaningful truths to myself, I rarely expressed them in public lest I be misunderstood, ridiculed or criticized. Of course, it was initially daunting to share them in my books, but I soon realized that when it comes to avoiding immediacy and intimacy, a book works even better than a persona because it gives you much more time to think before you “speak.” However, two appearances a week can severely test the vigilance of even the most scrupulous mask-wearer.

Fortunately, in matters of real import to my soul, my self-doubting Orphan rarely bests my intrepid Warrior and he pushed on. Had he not, I would have missed one of the most soul-satisfying experiences of my life. I’ve said this before, but to be sure you’ve heard me I need to say it one last time:  my relationships with the people I’ve met through this blog have become, like my grandchildren, the love affair of my old age.

Nonetheless, for several months now, Changing Woman has been eroding the boundaries of my routine and nudging me into new terrain. I can’t see the path yet, but I can read the signs: Warrior needs a rest and Wisewoman wants to move on. Neither will be left behind because both have more work to do, but for now, more balance is required.

As this chapter ends I don’t yet know what the next one will bring, so in this time of transition I ask for your forbearance. Traveling alone used to be enough for me but now I cannot imagine continuing without the companionship of fellow travelers. Perhaps we will meet only once a week for a while, perhaps less often. But I’ll still be here and I hope you’ll still want to connect. Your kind and timely thoughts, like the call I synchronistically received from my dear friends Sam and Eleanor as I was finishing this just moments ago, have made a profound difference in my life.  For all who have shared your journey with me here, I send this blessing:

For a New Beginning

In out-of-the-way places of the heart,

Where your thoughts never think to wander,

This beginning has been quietly forming,

Waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire,

Feeling the emptiness growing inside you,

Noticing how you willed yourself on,

Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety

And the grey promises that sameness whispered,

Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,

Wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled,

And out you stepped onto new ground,

Your eyes young again with energy and dream,

A path of plenitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not yet clear

You can trust the promise of this opening;

Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning

That is at one with your life’s desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure;

Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;

Soon you will be home in a new rhythm

For your soul senses the world that awaits you.

   John O’Donohue

                              Benedictus:  A Book of Blessings

 

26 Responses to “Love Letter to the Unknown”

  1. therese brooks Says:

    Ohhh that Changing Woman… she’s pretty powerful! How inspiring to see you answer the call of your soul! I am excited for you as you make this transition, Jeanie.
    much love,
    Therese

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Thank you, dear one. Yes, she’s a shape shifter and a game changer. Never one to sit around yearning for the past!! And a much better friend than she appears to be at first glance. Love and blessings heading your way, Jeanie

      Like

  2. Amy Says:

    Thank you. I know I am a new “follower” and you barely know me, but I have enjoyed your blog since I started coming here a few months ago after you liked one of my own posts. In wonderful synchronicity, I too have just been writing to a dear friend of the new beginning I feel is coming. Your words are timely, meaningful and helpful. All the best with your future endeavours. I look forward to hearing about the next chapter!

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Thank you for introducing yourself, Amy. Blessings on you and your wonderful blog as you move with your own change! Do let me know what happens, as I will you.

      Like

  3. Deborah Says:

    Dear Jeanie, more wonderful synchronicity here! ‘I can’t see the path yet, I can read the signs’. Your words arrive in rich and timely fashion as I leave for work this morning with my resignation letter in hand. It’s been a long time coming, my Wisewoman also needs to move on. Thank you for being you and all that you share of yourself. Blessings, Deborah.

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Two synchronicities in a row! How lovely. It’s good to be with people who trust their inner stirrings. My blessings to you today and in the time to come as you close one door of your life and stand at the threshold of another. May a path of plenitude open before you. I hope you’ll let me know how it unfolds! Blessings, Jeanie

      Like

  4. Catherine Says:

    Dear ‘Becoming wise elder’ Jean, may courage be with you at this threshold. And may your summer cave dwelling be filled with fruitfulness, synchronicity and blessings. Warmly Catherine

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Hi Catherine, I read just yesterday that Jung said something like, “The cave you most fear to enter is the one that will set you free.” I feel the truth of this all the way down to my toes! One of the earliest dreams I ever recorded was about trying to lock an elephant in a cave I most certainly did not want to enter! Now, of course, I know it was the home of my soul, and choosing to explore it was the wisest choice I ever made! Thank you for your companionship and blessing. Sending love from my cave of plenitude to yours, Jeanie

      Like

  5. Thank you Jean, and wishing your more happiness on your continued journey. Your posts have certainly helped me on mine and I’m sure I speak for many. Wishing you a peaceful and relaxing summer 🙂

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      It has been truly lovely getting to know you, Roberta. Thank you for your many kind words and affirmations. It has been my great pleasure to be of help. Wishing you peace and relaxation for your summer as well! With warm blessings, Jeanie

      Like

  6. gerilynn Says:

    Thank you so much for the blessing. It comes at a very meaningful time for me. I feel comforted that there are people like you who have gone before me and will be there with kind words of wisdom and advice just when I need them most on my own journey of the soul. Namaste.

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      You’re welcome, gerilynn. It warms my heart to know I’ve been a way-shower for you. As I sister traveler, I know you are and will continue to be the same for others. Sending blessings your way, Jeanie

      Like

  7. Joan pohl Says:

    I love reading your blogs. They have made me think and dream. It is summer and I think you will rest. Please continue to share your thoughts with us. Your writing is wonderful. I especially like your sentence about love after with your grandchildren in old age

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Thank you, Joan. Yes, I think I will rest and welcome all this season of rich growth has to offer. We shall see what comes of it. I’ll let you know. I truly appreciate your friendship and open, generous spirit. How well I remember the words of encouragement you gave me when I was on the threshold of my transition into grandmotherhood! What a joy this time has been. Blessings, my friend, Jeanie

      Like

  8. Andi Lothian Says:

    Hello Jung lady … not sure about your ‘old’ age … is this not an essential movement into a third age … to progress your journey towards the ‘fore’ shore … 🙂

    Whatever it is … blessings to you and yours …

    Andi

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Hello, Andi. Well, actually I do feel quite ‘Jung.’ 🙂 I think what is getting old is my old need to push myself. I’ll never stop wanting to connect and help; I just trust that I’m most effective when I’m most fully myself. And since I seem to be in a ‘growth spurt’ I need a bit more down time than I’ve been allowing myself in which to listen and reflect. Yes, this is definitely a movement into a third age…..it’s not so much of a retirement as it is a slowing down to allow further unfolding. Thank you for your companionship along the way my Jung friend. Blessings to you and yours as well, Jeanie

      Like

  9. Jeannie-
    For a New Beginning…..THANK YOU.

    Like

  10. Darla Says:

    Oh, precious new beginnings, how they soar and embrace and rock us gently. Thank you and bountiful blessings to you.

    Like

  11. Dear Jeanie,

    You are one of the most remarkable women ever to have touched my long life. Your ability to share your journey openly, has cast a revealing light on my shadow side, and in truth made me a bit envious that you found the courage to leap into the new world of social media and connections that I, ten years your senior, have not had the courage or discipline to try.

    I resonate with so many of your insights, truly appreciate your warm yet clear writing style, and at times have been in awe of your fierce, yet loving spirit in the exploration of spiritual/psychic reality.

    Godspeed dear Jeanie, in this new phase of your journey. I will miss my bi-weekly spiritual nourishment, but applaud your decision to listen to your soul and look forward to your occasional check-ins.

    Namaste and much love,
    Sally

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      I’m deeply touched by your comments, Sally. You do me great honor. I especially love “your fierce, yet loving spirit.” This reminds me of the mother bear with whom I have so closely identified for many years! I suspect we are very much alike that way! I know you to be a profoundly talented woman with your own brand of fierce dedication to your passions. Godspeed to you too, Sister Bear, on your continuing journey to yourself! Love and blessings, Jeanie

      Like

  12. katsoutar Says:

    Dear Jeanie,

    I have followed your blog for almost two years. I came across it entirely by accident whilst googling for images for some long forgotten endeavor. The image I found was the earth mother archetype and, actually, I have just realised I have it printed out and stuck to the wall right in front of me! I liked the picture and read the post. Then read back through your older posts and was instantly hooked. I followed your blog there and then and have read posts religiously ever since. What I would like to share is how much your blog has helped me in my personal life and understanding my soul’s journey. Through you I learned about the highly sensitive person which, all of a sudden, explained so much about myself. Through learning about this trait I have begun to manage my environments and experiences and explore how past events truly affected me. Also, I have experienced so much synchronicity with your writings. So many themes seemed to follow right behind an issue I felt ‘stuck’ with and helped me to move forwards. Particularly learning from my shadow, dreamwork and most recently dreams about excrement! I have been having so many dreams concerning ‘poop’ and wondering what it could mean when once again your blog nudged me in the right direction to learn more of what my subconscious is trying to teach me!

    It is with great sadness that I read that you are moving on but also with great gladness. I cannot express what a connection I feel with you and how grateful I have been for your wise words. And with yet more synchronicity I also feel poised on the edge of a leap into the unknown, a beginning of exploration that I hope will lead to deeper healing my body and soul so desperately needs. I am sure that your words have brought me to the place I need to be to begin.

    I will continue to follow all your check-ins and wish you glorious blessings for the next part of your journey.

    From a young mother in the UK, with thanks and with love,

    Kat

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Oh my Kat, your beautiful letter brings me to tears. Thank you, my sweet young friend for taking the time to let me know what you’ve learned about yourself here. It means the world to me. I’m filled with hope for you because I know from personal experience that if you continue with your dreamwork you will experience enormous personal growth in the coming years. I wish I could look into the future to see the you you will be ten years from now! If I’m still around then, I hope you’ll contact me again and tell me who you have become!

      Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;
      Soon you will be home in a new rhythm
      For your soul senses the world that awaits you.

      I’m sending love, gratitude and blessings to you at this time of new beginnings.

      Jeanie

      Like

  13. Kathleen Says:

    I write with gratitude for your willingness to explore the frontiers of what it means to be truly human and to risk much by sharing your questions and wisdom. I first came to this space about 18 months ago, read backward, read your book, and have deeply resonated with many of your experiences. Your offerings have been profound for my spirit, mind, and body. Blessings to you as you cross another threshold, knowing that to cross over is to find life – not lingering and haunting the old life. May you continue to encounter love and grace in the crossing and in the new place.

    To be human
    is to become visible
    while carrying
    what is hidden
    as a gift to others.

    To remember
    the other world
    in this world
    is to live in your
    true inheritance.

    from David Whyte’s “What to remember when waking”

    Kathleen

    Like

    • jeanraffa Says:

      Dear Kathleen, This exquisite poem and your corroborating words are a magnificent, affirming gift to me. I could ask for nothing more than to be fully human to the best of my ability while still remembering the other world in this world. To think that my explorations here are accomplishing this, that I am becoming visible while carrying what is hidden, and that this is a gift to others fills me with joy. I’m thrilled that my words here and in my book have been nurturing and healing to you in this way. Thank you. I wish you many blessings of continued growth. Jeanie

      Like


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